as seen on the Crave Crack-Up @ www.thecravecompany.com April 19, 2010
Have you ever been asked, “Are you a creative person?” I have and I always answer “no” because I can’t even print my name straight. To me, “creative” people were my friends in girl scouts that turned the colored pipe-cleaners into a ride at Disneyland, or my friend who paints scenery so amazing you want to jump into the picture.
The idea of “arts & crafts” give me hives; I have always viewed myself as creatively challenged (at least that’s what my second grade teacher called it when she saw the drawing of my house and asked if it was my dog). My Mom and sisters are amazingly gifted, my Mom can look at a lamp shade and think, “That would make an amazing centerpiece for the Cinco de Mayo party,” and it does. My little sister is an architect and shapes the Denver skyline with her genius. My oldest sister busted out four blank canvases recently and whipped up living room art that could be displayed at The Met. I can speak in public no problem, play through on a golf course full of men easy, but put a blank canvas in front of me and I am paralyzed with fear, let alone four.
However, I have learned that “creativity” takes many forms and all of us have some creative gift to offer the world. It’s not really a question to create, but rather a question of whether you will allow yourself to let your creativity flow through you into the world. I have always had a burning desire to make pottery; I would be so Demi Moore in Ghost, but I’m too afraid I wouldn’t even be able to make a cereal bowl. Fear is what stumps our creativity, there’s nothing scarier than putting your creativity out in the world and having a teacher say, “Is that your puppy?”
Creativity is a funny thing! I find myself most creative in the shower or the bathroom…what’s with that? Superman had a phone booth, I have the ladies lounge. At board meetings, I run to the bathroom and always come back with the break through solution to our challenge. My friends now know that when I come back from the restroom and say, “Guess what I was thinking”, they strap in for something amazing. When I have a problem to figure out, I take a shower. There’s something about that water flowing over my brain that interrupts the normal chatter and makes way for a creative breakthrough. I’ve gone through many laptops trying to write this column in the shower!
I have three books in the works, one for business, a funny one with my life stories, and of course a great fiction with a “hoochie” heroine who has a fling with the UPS man. I read a quote recently that I loved, it said, “Good girls want to have fun, bad girls make sure they do!” The leading lady in my novel is one of those bad chicks.
Spring is an amazing time of creation, look around, that dirt pile you’ve been passing along your drive now has a rainbow of colors bursting out of it. The birds are chiming in and adding their song to the season. My neighbor kids drew a cute picture on my car hood in the pollen dust. It’s time to wake up your creative juices and let them fly. Don’t miss a chance to show the world what’s growing under your dirt pile, take a nice long shower and come out and CREATE!
Monday, May 3, 2010
Fashion Sense is a Relative Term
as seen on the Crave Crack-Up @ www.thecravecompany.com March 24, 2010
In honor of the recent Fashion Week hoopla, I thought I’d share my fashion “sense” and I use that term quite loosely. For those of you that have read the CRAVE Crack Up blogs, you’ve quickly come to learn I am “challenged” in many areas of my life that include domestically, home interiorally, culinarily, and more. Fashion is no exception….I have narrowly escaped being featured in the black-boxed face photo in many a fashion magazine.
Every Spring I am inspired to clean out the closet, buy some colorful shoes and skip around looking cute. I pledge to wear a pretty floral print dress just because they look so dang fun on the TV ads but then realize I would actually have to shave my legs.
I adore all the fabulous sunglasses but find myself still sporting the $3.99 pair I bought at the Ritzville AM/PM after a long night. I vowed to never buy expensive eyewear because I was sure I’d lose or break them…these signature shades I picked up near the corn dogs have lasted me five years, naturally!
Each April I travel to Las Vegas for some much needed girl fun. One year I committed myself to having the right “Vegas” shoes, so I splurged. I found just the right pair of smoking hot black strappy pumps. When I got there, I made it from my room to the elevator in the hotel before I had to return to the room for my flip flops. They looked super cute in the pre-func party pics though.
A southern friend once sent me a Spring purse set. By “set” I mean that it looked like one of those Christmas dolls that you open and find 15 more mini-Christmas dolls inside, only this had a matching wallet, sunglass case, etc., it had a million pieces. I had no idea what to do with all of them but they sure were cute. Don’t be surprised that I don’t have a purse “set”…I just recently realized you should have more than one bag for different seasons.
Speaking of seasons, when I lived in the south I was outcast due to my major faux pas of wearing white heels before Easter. Silly me, it had been 80 degrees since New Year’s Eve so I figured white shoes with my cute floral skirt would work. The fashion police literally showed up and locked me in a dressing room at Dillard’s until Easter for that high crime.
You might say I am a “function over form” kind of gal. I am all about comfort and all my jeans have to do is at least accommodate my cell phone and lip gloss.
I do love coats, it’s a strange addiction but I must have a hundred in my closet. Ok, 50% are fleece, but I do dig the outer layer action. Funny thing is I am always so warm, I rarely wear them, not just because most of them would look ridiculous with my floral dress but also because I don’t want to be bothered with carrying one around. I would probably leave it in some coat check somewhere and lose it….like my $3.99 expensive eyewear.
Here’s to putting on a pretty floral dress and skipping around looking cute this Spring!
In honor of the recent Fashion Week hoopla, I thought I’d share my fashion “sense” and I use that term quite loosely. For those of you that have read the CRAVE Crack Up blogs, you’ve quickly come to learn I am “challenged” in many areas of my life that include domestically, home interiorally, culinarily, and more. Fashion is no exception….I have narrowly escaped being featured in the black-boxed face photo in many a fashion magazine.
Every Spring I am inspired to clean out the closet, buy some colorful shoes and skip around looking cute. I pledge to wear a pretty floral print dress just because they look so dang fun on the TV ads but then realize I would actually have to shave my legs.
I adore all the fabulous sunglasses but find myself still sporting the $3.99 pair I bought at the Ritzville AM/PM after a long night. I vowed to never buy expensive eyewear because I was sure I’d lose or break them…these signature shades I picked up near the corn dogs have lasted me five years, naturally!
Each April I travel to Las Vegas for some much needed girl fun. One year I committed myself to having the right “Vegas” shoes, so I splurged. I found just the right pair of smoking hot black strappy pumps. When I got there, I made it from my room to the elevator in the hotel before I had to return to the room for my flip flops. They looked super cute in the pre-func party pics though.
A southern friend once sent me a Spring purse set. By “set” I mean that it looked like one of those Christmas dolls that you open and find 15 more mini-Christmas dolls inside, only this had a matching wallet, sunglass case, etc., it had a million pieces. I had no idea what to do with all of them but they sure were cute. Don’t be surprised that I don’t have a purse “set”…I just recently realized you should have more than one bag for different seasons.
Speaking of seasons, when I lived in the south I was outcast due to my major faux pas of wearing white heels before Easter. Silly me, it had been 80 degrees since New Year’s Eve so I figured white shoes with my cute floral skirt would work. The fashion police literally showed up and locked me in a dressing room at Dillard’s until Easter for that high crime.
You might say I am a “function over form” kind of gal. I am all about comfort and all my jeans have to do is at least accommodate my cell phone and lip gloss.
I do love coats, it’s a strange addiction but I must have a hundred in my closet. Ok, 50% are fleece, but I do dig the outer layer action. Funny thing is I am always so warm, I rarely wear them, not just because most of them would look ridiculous with my floral dress but also because I don’t want to be bothered with carrying one around. I would probably leave it in some coat check somewhere and lose it….like my $3.99 expensive eyewear.
Here’s to putting on a pretty floral dress and skipping around looking cute this Spring!
Home is Where You Hang Your Hat
as seen on the Crave Crack-Up @ www.thecravecompany.com February 23, 2010
For those of you who have read my Rachel Ray blog you know I’m culinarily challenged, but love those food shows. I’m equally as inept at home design & décor but I love me some Design on a Dime (although I don’t actual DO either). I love the word “home.” I grew up in a small rambler with seven people, one bathroom and no dishwasher, but it was home. My Dad still lives there and it’s amazing how it feels sleeping in that house. It’s awesome when we all go home with our families, the bathroom line is just a little longer now with 23 people. After college I became a vagabond and lived all over the world, followed by 18 years as an army spouse. The Army has this cute little sign that says “Home is where the Army sends you.”
Needless to say, my “home” has been a stinky room the size of a closet, a grass hut in the middle of a rice paddy, an apartment on the 75th floor, a condo near a strip mall, a large sprawling tudor style, and approximately 5000 hotel rooms. I love all that cool stuff you get for your home when you get married but I made a critical mistake and had a really small wedding. Turns out I received three place settings of my formal china. When we’d have another couple over the fourth person had to eat off a plastic power ranger plate. I’m so home décor challenged I have lived for months with no pictures on the wall, have gone 20+ years without buying window treatments and I don’t have more than two bath towels the same color. When people ask me what “theme” I have decorated my homes I answer with a mid-modern century “pot pourri”.
As a joke one year my friends bought me an entire set of holiday plates. I now have salt & pepper shakers with snowmen on them…so stinking cool! I think chicks that wear hats are fashion forward stars, those with holiday-themed china are domestic goddesses….now I’m one. There are some staples I love that seem to make a house a luxurious home…a million pillows on your bed & lots of thread count sheets, a system to organize your plastic wear & lids, real flowers on your kitchen island, and that’s living. Oh, and whoever invented that electric fire place switch needs a raise…big time! I love huge tubs but have spent little time in them. The time I did spend was usually jockeying around to get comfortable around all those hot wheels in there with me. I did build a water feature on my deck once. I loved it, yeah for Lowe’s. I looked like a landscape architect genius just by putting part A into part B and firing up the hose. It was great to fall asleep to but it made me have to get up and pee all night long.
Oprah says make your home an oasis…take a look around and think about what you can do to make your house a little more “homey”…even if it’s just a $2 apple pie scented candle.
For those of you who have read my Rachel Ray blog you know I’m culinarily challenged, but love those food shows. I’m equally as inept at home design & décor but I love me some Design on a Dime (although I don’t actual DO either). I love the word “home.” I grew up in a small rambler with seven people, one bathroom and no dishwasher, but it was home. My Dad still lives there and it’s amazing how it feels sleeping in that house. It’s awesome when we all go home with our families, the bathroom line is just a little longer now with 23 people. After college I became a vagabond and lived all over the world, followed by 18 years as an army spouse. The Army has this cute little sign that says “Home is where the Army sends you.”
Needless to say, my “home” has been a stinky room the size of a closet, a grass hut in the middle of a rice paddy, an apartment on the 75th floor, a condo near a strip mall, a large sprawling tudor style, and approximately 5000 hotel rooms. I love all that cool stuff you get for your home when you get married but I made a critical mistake and had a really small wedding. Turns out I received three place settings of my formal china. When we’d have another couple over the fourth person had to eat off a plastic power ranger plate. I’m so home décor challenged I have lived for months with no pictures on the wall, have gone 20+ years without buying window treatments and I don’t have more than two bath towels the same color. When people ask me what “theme” I have decorated my homes I answer with a mid-modern century “pot pourri”.
As a joke one year my friends bought me an entire set of holiday plates. I now have salt & pepper shakers with snowmen on them…so stinking cool! I think chicks that wear hats are fashion forward stars, those with holiday-themed china are domestic goddesses….now I’m one. There are some staples I love that seem to make a house a luxurious home…a million pillows on your bed & lots of thread count sheets, a system to organize your plastic wear & lids, real flowers on your kitchen island, and that’s living. Oh, and whoever invented that electric fire place switch needs a raise…big time! I love huge tubs but have spent little time in them. The time I did spend was usually jockeying around to get comfortable around all those hot wheels in there with me. I did build a water feature on my deck once. I loved it, yeah for Lowe’s. I looked like a landscape architect genius just by putting part A into part B and firing up the hose. It was great to fall asleep to but it made me have to get up and pee all night long.
Oprah says make your home an oasis…take a look around and think about what you can do to make your house a little more “homey”…even if it’s just a $2 apple pie scented candle.
Rachel Ray, I'm not
as seen on the Crave Crack-Up @ www.thecravecompany.com February 2, 2010
I don’t know if any of you are “culinaryily challenged,” but I sure am. I am obsessed with the Food Channel but don’t cook anything I ever see prepared on there. There is something soothing and brain numbing about watching them create, compete, build absurdly shaped cakes, and whip up mystery ingredients I have never heard of.
How about that Rachel Ray gal? She rocks it every night in less than 30 minutes. The big difference is when I go to my pantry or fridge I don’t conveniently have all the spices and sauces placed by the elves so my 30 minute meal turns into a frustrated 80 minute search for cumin, and a trip to the grocery store. (Consequently, I leave the grocery store with everything BUT cumin and swing through the drive-through window before returning home.)
When I do cook I seem to have portion control issues. I grew up in a big family so I assume spaghetti noodles come in “single serving” bags only. Needless to say, I have a lot of leftovers and anyone who reheats spaghetti noodles knows, they aren’t too tasty.
My Mom is an amazing cook and she knows how to put on a party with picture perfect hors d’oeuvres, now SHE could have her own Food Network show. I think I was busy outside shooting hoop when she was whipping up chef lessons. So the pressure to live up to that is huge. She would bring heaping scrumptious cupcakes to my class parties… with every child’s name monogrammed on them. I am lucky if I can pull off a drive by drop off of Oreos for the school Valentines Day party!
My southern Mother-in-Law once tried to help me out by buying me a southern cookbook. Every dang recipe started with “make a rue”…have you ever tried to make a rue? Well, it’s a special little concoction of flour and butter that you have to try not to burn. I never made a single recipe from that book!
I will have to say I have the “sipping” part of this sip/savor category down pat. Never met a cocktail I didn’t like and they seem to be MUCH easier to make. Although I recently tried a signature cocktail recipe and it actually called for pear sorbet…my Coors Light generally does not come with ice cream and- huge surprise- I didn’t have any pear sorbet in my freezer (unlike Rachel) so I skipped the garnish, the vodka tasted fine without it!
If your idea of comfort food is a large bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos and you don’t own a food processor…you are not alone. Rachel rocks…me, not so much!
* a weekly humor post by Lynn Edwards
I don’t know if any of you are “culinaryily challenged,” but I sure am. I am obsessed with the Food Channel but don’t cook anything I ever see prepared on there. There is something soothing and brain numbing about watching them create, compete, build absurdly shaped cakes, and whip up mystery ingredients I have never heard of.
How about that Rachel Ray gal? She rocks it every night in less than 30 minutes. The big difference is when I go to my pantry or fridge I don’t conveniently have all the spices and sauces placed by the elves so my 30 minute meal turns into a frustrated 80 minute search for cumin, and a trip to the grocery store. (Consequently, I leave the grocery store with everything BUT cumin and swing through the drive-through window before returning home.)
When I do cook I seem to have portion control issues. I grew up in a big family so I assume spaghetti noodles come in “single serving” bags only. Needless to say, I have a lot of leftovers and anyone who reheats spaghetti noodles knows, they aren’t too tasty.
My Mom is an amazing cook and she knows how to put on a party with picture perfect hors d’oeuvres, now SHE could have her own Food Network show. I think I was busy outside shooting hoop when she was whipping up chef lessons. So the pressure to live up to that is huge. She would bring heaping scrumptious cupcakes to my class parties… with every child’s name monogrammed on them. I am lucky if I can pull off a drive by drop off of Oreos for the school Valentines Day party!
My southern Mother-in-Law once tried to help me out by buying me a southern cookbook. Every dang recipe started with “make a rue”…have you ever tried to make a rue? Well, it’s a special little concoction of flour and butter that you have to try not to burn. I never made a single recipe from that book!
I will have to say I have the “sipping” part of this sip/savor category down pat. Never met a cocktail I didn’t like and they seem to be MUCH easier to make. Although I recently tried a signature cocktail recipe and it actually called for pear sorbet…my Coors Light generally does not come with ice cream and- huge surprise- I didn’t have any pear sorbet in my freezer (unlike Rachel) so I skipped the garnish, the vodka tasted fine without it!
If your idea of comfort food is a large bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos and you don’t own a food processor…you are not alone. Rachel rocks…me, not so much!
* a weekly humor post by Lynn Edwards
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